Hi, I'm Leyla.

Um, hello, I'm Leyla. I've battled with social anxiety for ages, but I didn't know it was an ilness until recently. I always thought that it was just my personality. That I was 'weird' and 'strange' and 'socially retarded'. Last year my parents sent me to a clinic so I could get help with my anxiety, depression and self-harm. It didn't really help, because the sessions took place in groups and I was terrified to say what I was really feeling. I also had to share a dorm with 3 other girls which was the worst thing. I ended up hiding in the bathroom with a book most days. Anyway, reason I'm here is because I really want to find a way to get rid of my social anxiety. I'm 18 now and I feel like I've missed out on all my teenage years. I want to live and feel alive and be able to participate in things and make friends. I'm so tired of being alone and not being able to reach to people. I hope I can find some like-minded people here and finally make a few friends

I missed my finals last year because I freaked out and couldn't right them, but I got permission to write them next month. I have no idea what I'm going to do for the rest of the year. Everyone else my age has started university, and I'm just lost...

And now I feel like everyone's looking at this and reading this and thinking I'm stupid and pretentious...
I hate social anxiety.

Hi Leyla
Nobody is looking at you thinking you are stupid - because we kinda know how you feel.
I'm Kimi, 23 from England.
I hope you manage to make some friends here and get some advice and tips I know I've found it quite helpful, even if it is sometimes only to rant about bad days!

Hi Leyla! If I can give a word of advice, if you haven't already, sometimes you can get special accommodations for disabilities in high school and college. I didn't go for them very directly, and I regret it. I feel like I missed out on something that could've been really helpful. However, one or two years between high school and college really isn't a big deal. I went straight from HS to college and I really wish I had some time to get my head on straight(er). And a lot of people do it. When I got to college they put me in a dorm room with two other guys. Pretty tough for someone with social anxiety! That was one thing I requested assistance on, and they did get me a single person room. Anyway, I wish you the best of luck in the future, and a reminder that you're not alone.